Are you going through a divorce? Then, eventually, you’ll want to let your children know about what’s going on and how things are expected to change.
It’s easy to put too much information quickly on your children if you suddenly bring up your divorce. Instead, you may want to consider planning out how you could talk to your children. Here’s what you should consider:
Find the right time
While you may think it’s best to tell your children about the divorce as soon as the divorce process has started, you really should pick your timing carefully to avoid causing the children unnecessary stress. For example, if you told them about your divorce just before they go to school or bed, then they may be left with mixed feelings and struggle to pay attention in school or fall asleep. They wouldn’t have time to process their thoughts nor ask questions.
You could instead find a time in the day when the entire family is together and your children feel safe to process this new information. Some parents have chosen to talk to their children about their divorce on the weekends or over a school break so that the kids have more time to adjust.
Talk about what will change
Divorce is going to change a lot of things in your life, but also your children’s lives. You may have already discussed with your co-parent some of the changes your children might experience. However, there are likely changes that still need to be decided or haven’t even been considered yet. As such, you may consider talking about what you do know will change — such as who will be living in the home and who will not.
Let your children ask questions
Depending on the age of your children, they’ll likely have many questions. It may be best to let them ask whatever questions they have because this is possibly how they’re processing the situation. Similarly to what changes you can tell your children, you may not have the answers for everything yet. By working with someone with legal knowledge, you may be able to paint a better picture of what the future will look like.